issue #127 - the creative one

March 19, 2022

When was the last time you did something creative, just for you?

I thought I had been thoughtful about prioritizing my unicorn space - reading romance novels and crafting - for a while now. But I realize that reading romance novels have become a survival, subconscious habit - I need to read them, and I’m not myself when I don’t.

And I haven’t picked up a needlepoint canvas in weeks, though I have packed a project in the hopes I’ll get stitching time on vacation.

Friday was the first time I did something creative, simply because I wanted to. And I had the wonderful opportunity to do it with some of the most creative women I know, spearheaded by the phenomenal Krystal.

You’ll see much more of this fun project on my Instagram feed soon, but here’s a sneak peek.

The past few weeks have been a blur of delivering for other people - a lot of work meetings with our development partner, speaking and moderating all over the country and via Zoom, creating content for brand partners.

It’s been incredible and so fulfilling - but there’s only so much you can give and give before you run on empty, and need to fill up your tank again.

I’m going to focus on refilling my creative tank over the next four weeks. I tossed a blank journal and some fun pens in my luggage along with my needlepoint, and I hope something will fill those pages besides my children’s drawings and Rho’s musings about poop and other bathroom habits.

I have Find Your Unicorn Space, Big Magic, and Hustle & Float downloaded onto my Kindle if I feel called to review them and rediscover some new creative practices. I’m the kind of person who finds deep comfort in having books about my current situation at the ready - a literary security blanket, if you will.

I’ve forgotten what it’s like to play for play’s sake - and I’m sure I’m not alone. I hope you can find a little time to play and create some regular space for your creativity to fly high.

What A Sunday Dinner Party Looks Like (sponsored by Blue Apron)

I would love to be the person who hosts friends for dinner with a beautifully set table with matching dishes and cutlery and pretty linens, with unscented candles lit and music softly playing in the background.

One day, I may be that person. But these days, having friends over for dinner looks like the polar opposite.

While the kids are playing amongst themselves, we take out two Blue Apron meals and begin preparing our dinner in relative peace. One person chops, the other arranges the produce to be roasted on a tray, and the others do a quick tidy of the space and vacuums up crumbs from the kids’ snacks for the gazillionth time.

All the burners are fired up - one with a pot of water set to boil for some pasta, a saucepan simmering the sauce, spices roasting on another pan in preparation for paneer and more vegetables, and rice being cooked in the Instant Pot.

We sip our drinks, continue our conversations about work and the kids and the beautiful normalcy of sharing a meal together (a true gift these days), and give the kids the “dinner’s almost ready!” warning.

Toys are scattered all over the kitchen floor, and the soundtrack is their joyful screams instead of acoustic covers or bossanova. While some adults act as short-order cooks to prepare whatever the kids will eat, the other adults are wrangling them to the table and setting them up with activities to keep them somewhat occupied during the meal.

Once the kids are settled, we adults can take a deep breath and sit (well, stand at the counter) with our own meals.

A roasted red pepper pasta, zhuzhed up with the addition of some plant-based sausage and dill and a healthy pour of red pepper flakes, topped with roasted chili broccoli. Paneer and cauliflower cooked in a creamy spicy tomato sauce, garnished with mint and served with steaming basmati rice.

Blue Apron always delivers - both literally (it comes straight to your doorstep) and figuratively with satisfying, comforting meals and over 50 options every single week. Preparing them with a friend makes it even better.

It’s as far from the fantasy as possible, but the reality is pretty incredible as well.

What I Read This Week

I am still processing Sarah J. Maas’ A Court Of Thorns And Roses and Crescent City series - it’s something that likely requires its own dedicated post. But I did manage to read some other books, which I absolutely loved.

  • In A New York Minute by Kate Spencer - just the loveliest book that’s a love story on so many fronts - romantic love, female friendship love, love of New York City. I was hooked from the very first sentence, and fell quickly in love with Franny, Hayes, and fell more deeply in love with this incredible city I get to call home. This book was like biting into a warm chocolate chip cookie while wrapped in a kitten-soft blanket - you can feel the love radiating from the pages, and I was so sad when it was finished.

  • Ice Planet Barbarians #16 - as Kate is a fellow IPB superfan, it felt only right to pick the series back up after finishing her book. The series is starting to deviate, which I appreciate as the previous 15 books were starting to feel familiar (in the best way - like Hillstone’s spinach dip). I began reading book #17, but paused and am going to read the first Icehome book before I jump back in. I have the rest of the IPB series downloaded on my Kindle, and I fully expect I’ll finish it on vacation. I love these blue aliens and the women who love them so, so much.

Top #5SmartReads of the Week

The rest of the week’s reads (and conversations!) are below:

Your Questions, Answered

Can you share some of your Armoire outfit picks? Thinking of subscribing but not sure.Here you go! I absolutely love Armoire, and you can get a free month and two bonus items with my link.

Thoughts on TB’s spicy potato soft taco?Absolutely delicious, and I get mine with the jalapeño sauce when I order it and top with 2 Diablo and 1 Fire packets.

Will you be doing book signing events in NYC or NJ?My book tour is nearly over (just one more event at my alma mater, University of Washington!), but I’m working on a really fun event series with Jane Green (my queen!!) and The Wing that will have a NYC event, and a joint book event with Aparna Shewakramani later this spring.

All my public events can be found here.

What is the skincare curator website you use and love?It’s Haldi Skin, which has helped me update my routine as the weather changes or when my skin needs change (pore congestion, travel, etc).

You can fill out the survey and get your customized skin routine and recommendations here, and I love that they ask for your favorite products so they can build the routine around what you use and love, and what your new needs are.

Do you offer 1-1 coaching/mentorship? Also thanks for your Brooklyn kid-friendly recs :)I don’t, but I’m honored you would ask!

Here are some amazing coaches I recommend: Coach Keren, AB Coached, Leah Wiseman Fink, Darrah , and Komal Minhas.

What do you eat/buy when in India?Taco Bell India (really), clothes from Neeru’s, and jewelry from our family jeweler.

Hyderabad has the BEST food so I’m always eating.

What would you recommend for a vegan at Taco Bell?The black bean Crunchwrap supreme with no cheese or sour cream, fresco bean burrito. Linking a post Taco Bell wrote about their vegan go-to’s here.

What is your favorite brand for a casual spring dress?Nesara! Their dresses and kaftans are so comfortable and perfect and they’re all I packed for vacation. Code hitha gets you $10 off your order!

I even got a new caftan especially for my Bridgerton watch day :)

How do you think about philanthropy? i.e. Sporadic donations vs planned giving?We have annual commitments to Youth Represent and Feminist Press, as I serve on the board for both.

I’ve also started annual unrestricted donations to a number of nonprofits whose leaders I met at the Taco Bell summits- I’m so inspired by their work and want to invest in their impact however they need to use the funds. We have a donor advised fund that we may these donations from, along with my board commitment donations.

And when terrible things happen in the world, we donate via credit card as a one-off or for a number of months.

Under $250, event/occasion coat (not for everyday wear), good for 10-20 degree weather.This faux fur coat from River Island would be perfect, though faux fur is not nearly as warm as real fur. It’s $185.

I don’t know what your stance is on real fur, but if you’re okay with a vintage piece (already made and has kept people warm for decades!), there are some amazing finds on Etsy.

What are your thoughts on the word “boundaries” with family, friends, or partner?Necessary and healthy.

The Fair Play Life establishes boundaries through clear communication and division of responsibilities, which makes it so effective for partners.

With parents, it’s a lot harder. There are expectations and narratives that are so deeply internalized that we don’t know if they are what we truly believe or expectations we have accepted as truths. And even when have that clarity, communicating it and having the support we need can be tough.

Boundaries are really specific to the two people in the relationship, and there is no one-size-fits-all advice or framework I can offer. But I do think you need to protect your own peace and truth.

Someone else recommended Nedra Tawwab’s Set Boundaries, Find Peace. I haven’t read it but I LOVED her Skillshare course, so I trust that this book is an excellent resource.

Good housewarming gifts?A Goldbelly delivery of their favorite food - bagels, or that white chocolate coconut Tom Cruise cake that Ashley Spivey posted about…

You can also gift a Hotel Lobby Candle or Scrumptious Wicks candles! These are the only candles that don’t give me a headache. Pair it with a USB lighter. which is the best thing ever.

How did you know you wanted a second child? My first is 10 most and amazing. Too early to decide?Sri and I were in agreement that we wanted two kids early in our relationship- for us, it was just a matter of when we felt ready to welcome a second child!

Whatever you decide is the right decision.

How do I pronounce Hyderabad? I feel like I always say it wrong.Hi-dra-bhaad. If you can, roll your r’s in the -dra.

Do you think COVID cases will rise because mask mandates are over? xo, home with COVID.Wastewater surveillance data indicates cases are already rising - not my opinion, but a documented fact.

Stay safe out there, everyone!- Test regularly - Wear masks in crowded indoor settings (code HITHA20 gets you 20% off!)- Get vaccinated and boosted

I think we’ll have a BA.2 wave hit that we’re seeing in Europe, and another wave later this year.

What’s your favorite holiday and/or favorite family tradition. Christmas is pretty special because it’s the holiday Sri and I created our own traditions (Christmas Eve Potato Fest, 3 gifts per person, adding the annual Hallmark Star Wars and Trek ornaments to our collection) and brought others from our own families (LOTR marathon from his, toiletries in the stockings from mine)

Event/nice shoes that can hold up in sidewalk salt/snow/ice.These gold Sarah Flint pumps are made with saffiano leather, which is more durable than calfskin and has a great tread on its sole. It’s also insanely comfortable!

My friend Meghan has a code ($50 off your first order) - SARAHFLINTxMEGHAND.

And I’m off! Be well, and I hope you create a little space to play and find your own creative flow.

xo,HPN

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