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issue #50 - the one when this is starting to feel normal

issue #50 - the one when this is starting to feel normal

July 05, 2020

…and I don’t know how I feel about that.

My mornings are spent with Rho’s homeschooling. I sit with him during his multiple Google Meets with his teachers and classmates, watch the lessons and do the day’s activities with him, and have to bribe him with a chapter of a book or downloading a coloring page of his current favorites (Rainbow Brite and Dragon Masters are common requests), or 10 minutes with his iPad.

Once we’re done with the day’s work, my work begins. I used to jump straight in, and struggle to stay focused for the few hours I had to cram in a full day’s work. I’d drink that extra cup (or two) of coffee, grab my Utz sour cream + onion chips or a handful of baby Snickers for a snack, and feel sluggish and drained at the end of the day, before the dinner/bathtime/bedtime sprint.

Last week, I stopped jumping straight in. After I ate lunch with the kids, I’d retreat to my room for my solo work time. But instead of sitting at my desk and opening my laptop, I got back into bed. I opened up my Libro.fm app and hit play on my current audiobook, set a timer for 15 minutes, and put my phone face down. I grabbed the needlepoint project I’ve been working on for months, and mindlessly stitch while letting Abby Jimenez’ electrifying and moving words wash over my brain.

Once the timer went off, I slipped out of bed and quickly remade it. I moved to my desk, opened up my laptop, and got back to work.

Those 2-3 hours of work flew by, with most of my top 7 tasks getting crossed out from my list. Before I headed back down, I repeated the same little ritual that I did before my work block - bed, audiobook, craft. The phone stayed on my nightstand, and I gave the boys my full attention as they ate dinner, were bathed, and settled into bed.

I gave my husband and my parents’ my full attention as we tucked into our own dinner and talked about the day and the pandemic at large. We told the same old stories for the gazillionth time, the latest conspiracy theories being shared on WhatsApp, and then we all drifted away to spend the rest of the evening the way each of us wanted.

This routine - chaotic as it can get - feels comforting. But to feel some semblance of normalcy during a global pandemic that has uprooted so many people’s lives also feels uncomfortable.

This is NOT normal.

So I’m feeling weird about all of this. But I take comfort in how restorative my audiobook + crafting ritual is, and the sense of calm it gives me in the most consequential time of my life to date.

If this is your first e-mail from me, welcome! In addition to writing the book How To Pack, I'm an entrepreneur and angel investor, an avid reader, and a mom of two boys (a 5 year old and a 10 month old).

Every Saturday, I share the 25 best reads from the Internet (culled from the daily shares on my Instagram), the books I've read that week, and things I'm generally loving at the moment. You can join the conversation on all these articles - and more! - in my Facebook group.

Looking for my packing list template? Here you go!

One Smart Conversation

I joined Julie on Hashtag No Filter to share the reality of my COVID life. It was a fun conversation where Rho only interrupted me twice (a record!), and Julie has become a great friend and is just the best person to follow on Instagram. Give it a listen!

#ThingsILove This Week

No new things to share - just a lot of favorites that we’ve been loving extra this week.

If you’re new to needlepoint or want to take your skills to the next level, I highly recommend SBT Stitches classes and Thorn Alexander’s ebook. They’re also my favorite needlepoint artists, and I have a bunch of their canvases waiting to be stitched.
My pandemic joggers and hoodie have worn and washed extra in the past couple of weeks. I won’t blame you if you buy multiple ones.
I scribble down whatever’s on my mind or the day I’d like to have every morning in my Silk + Sonder journal. They’ve just launched a Kids version, and I’m really excited to share this ritual with Rho as well.
Two things that Rho and I have been enjoying together are Meg Biram’s online art classes and Treasure Trunk Theater’s Imagination Club. Live online classes have been a struggle, but on-demand versions have been a lot more successful and a fun way to break up the day.
Jam With Jamie’s YouTube classes are great for both kids. They jam around, and I can get a solid 10-15 minute stretch to fold laundry or load the dishwasher or just sit for a second.
For my ‘I only read physical book’ purists, this book light has been a game changer when I’m reading at night and my husband is asleep. That said, I’m usually reading from my Kindle Oasis at night for its convenience - it’s feather-light, the backlight is adjustable, and the side buttons make for easy one-handed reading. I primarily read my NetGalley advance reader copies on my Kindle, and will purchase new books directly from Bookshop (still working on building my shop!) or Libro.fm to support independent bookstores.

What I read this week

Missed Translations (audiobook) - The South Asian experience has been preserved in a stereotype in the books published and the shows launched in the past 5 years. And while I'm just grateful that our stories are finally being told in mainstream American culture, it's something that's unsettled me as more and more art is being published. Two incredible works have shaken the model minority South Asian stereotype. The first was Hasan Minhaj's excellent one-man show, Homecoming King. The second is Missed Translations. Sopan Deb's memoir on defining his own South Asian identity and discovering who his parents were - and are - is deeply moving, wickedly funny, and unlike any memoir I've ever read. Deb writes with incredible honesty and sensitivity to his parents, despite their wrought relationships. It's an emotional journey that had me crying, laughing, and tapping my Kindle furiously as I read it. It's an extraordinary book, and an important one in the canon of both memoirs and the South Asian diaspora. And I guess I'm going to have to get into basketball, so I can continue to enjoy Deb's incredible writing.
The Happily Ever After Project (c/o Libro.fm, physical book here) - this is the first romance audiobook I’ve listened/read, and it blew me away. Jimenez’s story of an artist and musician brought together by a lovable dog was filled with so much heart and emotion, and the actors who narrated the book brought it to life and left me far more emotional than all the non-audio romances I’ve read recently (and I’ve read some excellent ones). I was completely caught up with Sloane’s finding herself as she falls in love, Jason’s emotional fortitude (and reading about emotionally evolved men in general in these books), and getting a glimpse of the fame that follows a rising star from a new perspective. I stayed up far too late some nights to listen to this book in bed, and it was worth it. Currently listening - the actual playlist from the book.
Sex & Vanity (ARC provided by NetGalley, out July 28th) - Kevin Kwan’s Crazy Rich Asians trilogy is one of my security blanket book series. I pick it up (or watch the film) when I need something comforting and to escape my own life. Sex & Vanity is a new addition to that collection. This book introduces a whole new set of characters (with some cameos made by old favorites), and makes you want to escape to Capri this very instant. I loved how Lucie - a girl so paralyzed by being perfect and being ENOUGH for her father’s patrician white family, her half-Chinese identity and the global social circles she travels in - as she discovers who she really is, who she really loves, and that the things people say and the things people feel can be wholly separate. Unlike his previous trilogy which focused on an ensemble of characters, Kwan’s latest focuses solely on Lucie and follows her through some truly mortifying, self-affirming, and completely fantastical moments that sweep you away but keep you grounded at the same time. I thoroughly loved this book, and I’m already mentally casting the film version myself.

I’m building outmy Bookshop store, which will house all my favorite books in all the categories. Please consider purchasing your books through Bookshop and Libro.fm (use code HITHA for 3 free books when you start a membership) to support independent bookstores!

Hitha’s Favorite Things

Libro.fm is my favorite audiobook app (it credits your favorite independent bookstore with the sale). Use code HITHA to get 3 audiobooks for the price of 1 when you create a monthly membership. You can find my favorite audiobooks here.
This is the only book club I’m a member of
my Amazon shop
my favorite vitamins (both their pre-natal and their essential one for women). Use code HITHA for 10% off your first 3 months.
CBD has been a lifesaver for me. Get 20% off your first order with code HITHA.
my favorite produce delivery company that supports small farms in the process. Use code COOKWME-NM5DMZ for 25% off.
the app to save #5SmartReads to read later
the notebook that has changed my life (see how I use it here and here). Get 15% off with code HITHA15.
the marriage check-in my husband and I do every single week
my favorite workout - and why. Use code G37YVV for $100 in accessories (spin shoes, weights, headphones - oh my!)
Small Packages (one of my portfolio companies) is the curated gift box company I’m always talking about - get 15% off your order with the code HITHA
my ultimate kitchen essential (and one of my portfolio companies)